It’s been six weeks since I last saw my surgeon. Today I had to go back and see him for the last time before my surgery, just eleven days away now.
I came to the appointment with my list of questions, all ready for a long discussion that would put me at ease.
I was surprised to hear that my surgery will only take about two hours. I had read that this procedure takes 2-3 hours per side so had been expecting a much longer time frame.
I was pleased to hear that my expanders will definitely be partially filled during the surgery, so I will come out with at least a tiny bit of shape, not entirely flat chested.
I was satisfied when we went through the timeline of the procedure again. I can now “plan” in my head knowing that my expander fills will start sometime in mid January, and my exchange surgery to get my implants should be around early April (although I may delay this until the end of April).
After all the questions we went through the many forms needed. I signed my boobs away, agreeing to the surgery.
I was then measured to make sure the expanders are the correct width for my build. I have heard horror stories about people receiving ones that are too big and they caused a lot of pain (amongst other things!). Having these expanders is the most painful part of this whole procedure, so I don’t want it to be any worse than it needs to be.
Finally I was given a whole pile more forms to take home and fill out for the hospital, and a number to ring to confirm the anaesthetist and get his costs to pay. I was also given the time of my arrival at hospital.
For my lumpectomy I didn’t have to be there until 5pm. My surgery didn’t happen until about 8:30pm, and I was back in my room about 10:30pm. During my last appointment my surgeon had assured me this time it would be during the day.
I was pleased with this, because I knew my nerves would be getting the better of me. I would be restlessly pacing around, unable to sit still or focus on any task. I also would need to be fasting for much of the day, and therefore would be wanting nothing else but to eat!
I had carefully arranged my timetable to keep me busy before my surgery. Monday we get back from Bali, Tuesday I babysit my niece and nephew, Wednesday morning I am getting my hair cut and coloured, finishing off my Christmas shopping in the afternoon and, and in the evening going to the movies. Then I would wake up (assuming I could sleep at all) and go straight to the hospital.
Unfortunately my surgeon was wrong! I am last on his list again, this time needing to arrive at the hospital at 4pm. Now I am going to have to come up with a plan to fill those hours too 🙂
I had these ideas in my head that this appointment would answer all of my questions and settle me down. In some ways it did, but it has still left me with butterflies in my stomach and an uneasy feeling. But I think that no matter how many questions I ask or answers I get, that feeling of signing away my boobs will never be a comfortable one.
I do wonder if I can go through with this. Then I think of the alternative, and know that I have no real choice.
In the meantime, I’m in Bali for a week of relaxation before the big day arrives.